Did you know that in 2021, around 41. 7 million adults in the United States received treatment or counseling for their mental health within the last year, according to a Stitista (2023) article on Mental Health. The National Institute of Mental Health reports that in 2021, more females participated in mental health services with 51.7% participation, compared to 40% participation of their male counterparts. In the past 4-5 years, but especially in the past 2 years, we hear more and more about people attending therapy, advocating for people to prioritize their mental health, and promoting self care.
As a participant of talk therapy and a Licensed Masters Social Worker with over 10 years of experience working in the Mental Health Rehabilitation Field, I’ve found that one of the most crucial components of my ability to care for myself is talk therapy. This year will be my third consecutive year attending talk therapy consistently. I attribute my heighten self awareness, along with my ability to skillfully and competently navigate adulthood and the many roles I ascribe to on any given day, to my participation in talk therapy. Signing up to meet with a professional to help me sift through life’s challenges was only half the battle. There are several crucial components to therapy, in addition to showing up. In order for talk therapy to catapult change in your life, there are certain things that you, the person needing help, must do. Keep reading, I’ll give you the tea sis.
Show up:
When making the decision to begin talk therapy, this is sometimes the hardest part. Especially if you have never been before, if you are fighting internal battles due to the stigmas associated with therapy, and/or if you don’t feel like you have the time to do so. If you have taken the first step to go to therapy, cuddos to you momma, I am proud of you! If you are still struggle to take this step, my encouragement to you is to do it scared. Every week I attend therapy I do so with effort and intention. No matter what life throws at me during the week or the day of my appointment, I prioritize this time to step back, take a seat, and unpack all the things that may be going right or wrong in my world. So no matter how hard life gets, make it a priority to show up!
Be Honest:
If I’m being completely transparent, showing up to therapy and not being honest is a complete waste of time. Therapy is only helpful if you are honest. There is no magic approach that can help you resolve whatever challenges you show up to therapy to resolve if you aren’t honest with your therapist. Like all relationships, it may take time for you build a trusting relationship with your therapist in a way that allows you to be more open over time, but I urge you to start small with building trust. Tell your therapist about your discomfort in trusting them, if that is a true feeling for you in this process. Give your therapist time and opportunities to help you unpack some of the things you may be facing. If you find that your therapist “gets you” and their guidance is helpful, they may be a keeper. If you feel like the chemistry just isn’t there, you as a client have a right to choose to leave the therapeutic relationship; and even ask for a referral, if you feel comfortable enough to do so. In addition to everything else, Licensed Mental Health Professionals are required by law and ethical standards within their respective jurisdiction to keep all things discussed between you and them.
Be Fair:
Be fair to yourself and to the therapist you are working with. Remember that therapy is a collaborative effort between you and the therapist to improve your quality of life. The therapist can only help you when you provide them with credible and reliable information. So keep this in mind, when discussing different situations that may arise. Give context, tell each side of the story from your perspective, and be open to being challenged. Giving credible information to your therapist allows your therapist to give insight that can be useful to you in real life, so be fair. Also, keep in mind that your therapist is human, and therefore, may miss the mark or get it wrong. In the event that something like this occurs while in therapy, be honest with your therapist about your feelings and give them a chance to explain, give perspective, and/or make it right.
Be Open:
In order for change to occur, your current worldview and perspective will more than likely be challenged during this process. We often refer to this as, our therapist “reading us for filth.” If your therapist doesn’t do this from time to time, I would absolutely question the effectiveness of your process. When this happens, allow yourself to be open to what the therapist is saying; even if you have to request time to process it all. Afterall, this is the point of going to therapy; to be challenged us in ways that causes us to change for the better and consequently become better version of ourselves, and navigate life more efficiently.
I hope that you find this helpful and if you are considering talk therapy, allow this to give you some insight into the process.
Happy Healing Sis!
Until next time.
-Cass