Being a mom is hard. Someone is always in need of something, be it physical care, a meal to eat, plans to coordinate, a hand to hold, a lap to sit on, or a ride; there is always something to do. Therefore, we are always in service, always giving, often sacrificing our time; or that one moment that we thought we would have alone, our mental capacity, or our bodies. For this reason and so many more, motherhood can often feel overwhelming, defeating, discouraging, and isolating, causing moms to become overstimulated, depressed, and even anxious. Motherhood is often a journey that starts with so much hope, love, beauty, and joy; and overtime, it becomes our biggest hurdle, often seen as an inconvenience. This is no coincidence, this is warfare. Spiritual warfare, because motherhood is ministry.
As a psychotherapist, one of the theories I often reference while working with my clients is attachment theory. Attachment theory is a lifespan model of human development that emphasizes the central role of caregivers. Attachment theory states that early caregiver relationships establishes social-emotional developmental foundations for a child’s life and gives them a template for social emotional interaction. Considering this, as a mother, you are your child’s first interaction with the world, essentially giving them a foundation and a blueprint on how to show up in the world. Based on your interactions with your child, you teach them how to love, how to set boundaries, how to express feelings, how to navigate conflict, and so much more. Your interactions with your child, especially in the early developmental years, will impact the job they choose, their relationships, how they show up in friendships, and the kind of parent they will be. The enemy knows this, and will often use mothers as a means of introducing trauma to children.
As moms, we have to be intentional about how we show up in motherhood for this very reason. The deeper I’ve gotten into motherhood, the harder this journey has gotten. I often refer to this phase of motherhood as “the middle”. The middle of motherhood is where there is the highest potential for mental breakdown due to the non-stop schedules, year around sports, everyone is in school, and you are the one having to manage it all. In the middle is where the stress is high, the days are long. There are growth spurts, school promotions, passing down of clothes, joy for getting here, and tears that everyone seems all grown up. Mommy’n in the middle is intense!
This is where I’ve learned to lean on God the most, especially in motherhood. Some days feel heavy, some moments, my feelings of overwhelm gets the best of me, and some nights the fatigue sets in before I am able to clear my list of tasks. In these moments, I’ve learned call on Jesus and allow Him to help bear the burden and He lightens my load every time. I am reminded of 1 Peter 5:7, to cast my cares onto Him and find rest for my soul in Him. This has been most helpful when it comes to motherhood because moms hold the weight of the family and that load gets so heavy at times.
I hope that if you are reading this, you do the same, find rest in Jesus. He’s the best help.
Until next time.
Cass